A genuine transhuman lifestyle entails more than intellectual speculation about the future. It reveals itself in the nature of our relationships on a human level. It shows in the way we regard ourselves and in how we treat others.
The term transhuman suggests that we are transcending our limitations; not only our biological and physical confines, but also our social and emotional shortcomings.
Each of us is unique. We all bring with us our individual DNA, our upbringing, our experiences, our triumphs, our failures, our strengths and our weaknesses. The variety of human individuality is one of our greatest assets.
It has been said that if your aim is to climb a mountain, what matters most is not how high you might be, but whether you are headed up or down. We all have to start somewhere, and the best place to start is where we are right now.
EMOTIONAL INTIMACY
What does emotional intimacy have to do with the philosophy of transhumanism? Isn't such "psychobabble" out of place in a discussion about the future of science and technology?
Our journey toward posthumanity involves building and refining our bodies, our minds, and our personalities. Posthuman is defined as "unprecedented physical, intellectual, and psychological capacity". Psychology deals with human emotions and emotion-driven behavior; limitations of our ability to effectively relate to and interact with others often arise from difficulties with emotional intimacy. A personal psychology improved to the level of transhuman must therefore include a high degree of emotional intimacy.
It is a truism that before you can effectively love another person, you must love yourself. This implies first knowing yourself, something which for many of us is not easily achieved. The challenge of truly allowing ourselves to be known to ourselves—let alone to others—can be frightening to the point of paralysis.
What causes people to shy away from deep self-analysis and self-understanding? I believe the answer lies in the fundamental angst at the core of human self-awareness. An honest, unmitigated examination of our inner essence—undiluted by religious or mystical superstition—requires that we confront the actuality of our existential separateness from all others, our (current) powerlessness over the inexorability of mortal deterioration, our eventual nothingness in the face of death, and the all but ineffable pointlessness of life, of being, of the universe, and of our very selves.
For every seeing soul, there are two absorbing facts — I, and the abyss.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Compounding these terrifying ultimate realities is our sickening (apparent) inability to do anything about them. Even the greatest, most admirable, most powerful humans are but insignificant dust motes compared to the nearly incomprehensible totality of time and space. And we—so painfully aware of our own shortcomings, our weaknesses, our frailties and our failings—what then are we? It can be shattering to take such an unblinking look at ourselves.
But look we must if we hope to know ourselves. Only then can we begin to achieve a measure of acceptance and comfort with who and what we are, eventually learn to truly love ourselves as we are, and thereby make it possible for us to engage in the greatest of all human activities, that of loving others.
"As one who spent years twisted up and around and upside down on the relationships roller coaster, I would say that there are times when it is necessary to sit alone and learn to be a good friend and mother for yourself. It's like cleaning house. When your house (inner self) begins to resemble a cozy place with a lot of care and love, then it makes sense to invite someone in. Usually at that point, you don't have to go very far to meet someone, because then they find you."
Amara Graps, Astrophysicist
Openness to Intimacy in Friendships
In our modern culture, the word "love" most often occurs in the context of romance or sex. Similarly, the word "intimacy" almost always refers to physical or sexual closeness. Clearly there are deeper and more profound meanings for these words.
Romantic love, or "falling in love", is actually one of the weakest and least productive forms of love. By contrast, healthy emotional intimacy between close friends or family members is powerful, binding, and uplifting.
The act of being vulnerable with another human being, especially one with whom we have no existing or desired romantic attachment, requires trust, sensitivity, self-awareness and good judgment. Exercised appropriately, it will broadly expand our effectiveness in human relationships of all types. Nothing can surpass or replace the personal growth acquired in this way.
The measure of our productive connection in healthy human relationships is the level of our willingness to be vulnerable. This does not suggest, of course, that we should ever allow ourselves to be used, mistreated, or abused. It does mean that we need to be open to the possibility of being hurt.
There is risk in emotional intimacy. As flawed humans still learning to understand and communicate effectively, we will say or do the wrong thing at times, and feelings will be hurt. In attempting to forge intimate emotional connections, there is no guarantee that we will remain free from pain—rather, the truth is that we must experience pain, fear, loss, grief and sorrow to a greater or lesser degree. This is the price we pay for growth and understanding.
Being vulnerable implies allowing ourselves to be known. Learning to be comfortable with ourselves requires unblinking introspection; healthy intimate connections with others entails similar inspection. Opening our deeper selves to the critical (but gentle) eye of others is the essence of trust.
The hardest skill that you will ever learn in your life is
communication with another human, especially those humans you love.Amara Graps, Astrophysicist
People in relationships will make mistakes and feelings will be hurt. However, by carefully choosing our partners and practicing effective communication, we can minimize the repetition of mistakes and optimize our individual and relationship growth.
Emotional intimacy that is transformative requires sincere commitment and diligent work. This website, though, is not the place for a primer on personal communication skills. There are any number of excellent books on the subject, including "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People", "You Just Don't Understand", and "Getting the Love You Want".
Good communication leads to understanding, understanding makes empathy possible, and empathy in action builds trust. When we understand, care about and trust each other, we are on our way to relationships that enable transcendence of human emotional limitations. We can experience less pain and more love.
SEXUALITY
More than others, sexual relationships are fraught with danger. This goes beyond the obvious risks of unwanted pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases. The greatest danger is the emotional vulnerability to which our sexuality can expose us. In this regard, it is critical that both parties in any sexual connection have a commitment to—and a sense of—equality in the relationship.
As illustrated by the multitude of heartbreaking true stories about child sexual abuse, and the devastating long-term consequences of such trauma, the sex act plays more than a physical part in our lives. Our emotions, our egos, even our very selves can be profoundly affected.
At its best, human sexual expression is perhaps the most wonderful, beautiful, life-affirming mode of communication we may ever know. For the emotionally mature transhuman, grounded in self-awareness and driven by an abiding love and respect for all others, it can be an ongoing force of transcendent emotional connection.
In addition to the perils of heightened emotional vulnerability concomitant with sexual partnering, there is (currently) a very real need for physical safety. The transhuman personality will not only seek to protect his or her own health and well-being, but will also show an equal concern for that of the partner.
It is reasonable to expect that advancements in medical research could someday make the fear of sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV/AIDS, a thing of the past, along with unplanned pregnancies.
To engage in or to condone discrimination based on color, ethnicity, language, gender, age, sexual preference or other human differences is entirely inconsistent with transhumanism. Our philosophy springs from the deep well of humanism, where diversity is celebrated and universal tolerance is prized.
During the last several decades, political and social reforms within the world's progressive and developed societies have made it possible for those who are different from the majority to come out into the open. As the rate of change continues to accelerate exponentially—not just in science and technology, but also in democracy, freedom, economics, and culture—we may witness an unprecedented surge in the numbers of people with radically unconventional lifestyles. This is in itself a sign of the transformation of humanity: becoming transhuman on the way to posthuman. We welcome and embrace this vigorous branching of the human tree.
Throughout history, approximately 95%* of humans have lived a predominantly heterosexual lifestyle. Will that number change significantly when it becomes feasible to choose/change our orientation? It's impossible to say for sure; my guess is that the percentage identifying themselves as gay or lesbian will not vary appreciably, but that many more people will be openly bisexual. I could be wrong, of course.
* This estimate is surrounded by controversy. Gay rights activists think it's too high. The religious right says it's too low. For our purposes here, the precise number does not matter, although I am well aware that for many, especially those in the gay/lesbian minority, it is an issue of great importance.
A small fraction of humans are transsexual or transgender; they consider themselves to be the sex opposite that which they were born, or at least they practice living that way. In the future, changing one's gender will be far simpler, less expensive, and more effective than with today's procedures. This may lead to a large number of transhumans and posthumans being multisexual, meaning they will vary their gender and/or their sexual orientation as often as they wish.
On the way to becoming posthuman, we will reach the point where we will be able to choose the form (and gender) of the physical body we inhabit. We will also have the option of spending less time in this ordinary physical world, and more time in a world of simulated reality.
Among other benefits, these new capabilities will offer tantalizing possibilities for sexual experimentation and enjoyment. The provisos outlined above (the need for trust, communication, equality, safety, etc.) will still adhere—although if our sexual partners are artificially simulated and do not represent real persons, some of the risks may be moot. However, as virtual reality becomes more robust, it is possible that our cybersex partners could achieve a measure of self-awareness and thereby be entitled to sentient rights of their own. Brave new world indeed.
MARRIAGE
Awareness of Historical Origins
There may be a tendency, when we contemplate discarding our flawed, inherited bodies and taking control of our own evolution, to think that we can also blithely disregard our anthropological history. Not quite.
If we are to remain partially human—whether transhuman or posthuman—and retain the noblest parts of our humanity, it is essential that we remember where we came from.
Historically, in almost all cultures and times, humans have pair-bonded, or at least have sought pair-bonding. This bond, once ritually confirmed, was intended to be for life, even if it did not always work out that way. Like it or not, we are a species that attempts to practice monogamy. We marry.
Evolutionary biologists tell us that this is the behavior most likely to allow our offspring to reach maturity and propagate on their own. What, then, will happen to the practice of long-term pair-bonding when advancements in reproductive technologies, medical science, and cultural economics permit us to have children and raise them safely without the need for traditional marriage?
Some might say this day has already arrived. Indeed, throughout the developed world, monogamy has been on the decline for decades. Still, as stated earlier, to retain the best of what makes us human, it behooves us to remember our roots. Throwing away cultural forms honed over thousands of years may not be wise. Reflection, introspection and conversation can help us choose the best course for our future.
Respect for Value of Long-term Commitments
Activists within the fledgling transhumanist movement overwhelmingly tend to be young (under 45), well-educated white males. Most live in the United States, although increasing numbers are coming from Canada, western Europe and South America. Africa and Asia are as yet poorly represented.
It's easy to understand these demographics in terms of age, education, nationality and ethnicity—they are generally representative of Internet users at large, and the Net is where the message has naturally been spread—but how do we account for the gender imbalance?
Data compiled by transhumanist organizations indicate that around 90% of members are male. One hypothesis to explain this disparity is that women are generally more focused on relationships and less on technology (we won't go into the "nature versus nurture" cause of this evident difference between the sexes, not here at any rate).
A female friend wrote, "I have mixed feelings about technology, though obviously I find it convenient for many facets of modern life. I think we most essentially need to learn to be comprehending, compassionate, healthy humans from the inside out, working with nature and imposing ourselves on nature as little as possible. I don't think we've done such a great job of just being human. I think we need to start by improving (drastically) on that plane, beginning with humility and sensitivity with regard to how we interact with the rest of the universe, let alone our fellow humans..."
She's right, of course. There is much we have done wrong in our relationships with nature and with our fellow humans. Before we rush off and remake the planet, the solar system, and the galaxy in our own image, let's think first about how we can get along better with each other, here and now.
What do our attitudes about marriage and long-term commitment say about our emotional maturity? Can we be ready to become transhuman/posthuman before we are fully human? I include myself, first and foremost, in this challenge to focus more on being human and less on my techno-futurist fantasies.
Having said all that (see above), this website is about change, about progress, about becoming more and better than what we are now. If this development includes exploration of new types and styles of intimate human relationships, the thinking and feeling transhuman must be open to considering them.
A few such options might include:
Marriage contracts that automatically expire after, say, five years unless renewed by both parties.
Same sex marriage accorded full legal status.
Open marriage, in which extramarital sexual relationships are not discouraged (experimentation of this sort in the 1970's suggested that it usually doesn't work very well).
Legalized polygamy (multiple wives) polyandry (multiple husbands) and group marriage (multiples of both).
Virtual marriage, enacted between a human and an AI entity, or between two (or more) AIs.
Cross-species marriage—a startling idea at first, but conceivable after genetic engineering has developed chimpanzees or other animals (or chimeras) possessing at least human level intelligence and emotional capacity.
Will some or all of these things become reality? Absolutely. Will traditional marriage fade away completely? Absolutely not. In the first place, just because some humans (or AIs) become posthuman, that doesn't mean all humans will. A large number will choose to remain (mostly) un-enhanced. Many of them will carry on the venerable practice of monogamous male-female pair-bonding; it's also possible that many posthumans will choose to do the same.
Evaluation of "Duty" to Have Children
"There is growing evidence that the birthrate in several developed societies is falling below the replacement rate (the number of adults who die each year exceeds the number of children born needed to replace them) with considerable negative consequences for those societies. The most important of these consequences is that an ever smaller number of workers must provide for an ever increasing number of older retirees (and other dependents). To put it more sharply, if we once held that the first social duty of the family was the moral education of children, we may now have to say that duty calls for having children at all. Of course, one must stress that no stigma should be attached to families who cannot have children or who see themselves as psychologically ill-qualified to raise them. But the notions that children are a burden, interfere with career and leisure time, and are 'inconvenient' are simply more reflections of radical individualism and Sisyphean materialism. Neither is compatible with a good society."
(from "Next: The Road to the Good Society" by Amitai Etzioni)
When I initially read the paragraph above, I was taken aback by the proposition that "duty calls" for us to have children. As a long-term advocate of both population control and a woman's right to choose, I was not comfortable at first with the observation that a birthrate below the replacement rate (minus ZPG) has considerable negative consequences. The argument, however, appears sound.
It would be in keeping with transhumanist philosophy for prospective parents to rigorously evaluate the pros and cons of having children in terms of their obligation to society at large as well as in the context of their personal lives. The narcissistic viewpoint that children are a burden or an inconvenience is incompatible not only with a good society, as Etzioni asserts, but also with a transhuman approach to life.
We should also bear in mind, of course, that the very meaning of having children is bound to change in the near future as radical new choices become available. Nevertheless, our fascination with genetic engineering, etc., should not be allowed to distract us from the more fundamental humanist values concerning parenting. MORE